1 00:00:11,369 --> 00:00:14,550 I'm going down south, I'm gonna have myself time. 2 00:00:15,070 --> 00:00:18,190 Friendly faces everywhere, humble folks without temptation. 3 00:00:18,590 --> 00:00:21,330 I'm going down south, I'm gonna leave my world to hide. 4 00:00:21,610 --> 00:00:25,670 And we're parking day or night, people spouting hot and diverse. And on the 5 00:00:25,670 --> 00:00:27,950 south, I'm gonna see if I can't unwind. 6 00:00:31,520 --> 00:00:34,480 Come on down south out there and meet some friends of mine. 7 00:00:42,500 --> 00:00:43,800 Betsy! Betsy! 8 00:00:44,040 --> 00:00:44,839 Guess what? 9 00:00:44,840 --> 00:00:47,700 My dad took me to the Asian pop -up store. Look what I got! 10 00:00:48,660 --> 00:00:49,720 Serenity Labubu! 11 00:00:50,180 --> 00:00:51,460 Oh, it's so cute! 12 00:00:52,100 --> 00:00:54,120 Isn't it? I was at the Asian pop -up, too! 13 00:01:03,240 --> 00:01:05,800 Oh, dude, dude, check it out. It's about to happen again. 14 00:01:06,160 --> 00:01:07,160 Ah, shit. 15 00:01:07,360 --> 00:01:11,540 I actually have loyalty labubu already, and I got a little costume for it. That 16 00:01:11,540 --> 00:01:12,980 is seriously so cute. 17 00:01:13,700 --> 00:01:16,660 Kenny, you guys, girls with labubus. It's about to happen again. 18 00:01:17,000 --> 00:01:21,940 Oh, labubu. Come on. And then, believe it or not, I actually have chestnut 19 00:01:21,940 --> 00:01:28,760 labubu. No way. That is the rarest one. Isn't it so cute? So stinking cute. But 20 00:01:28,760 --> 00:01:31,780 it's really rare. Are you sure it's not a knockoff? Oh, dog, here we go. 21 00:01:32,060 --> 00:01:33,060 Yeah, it's just... 22 00:01:34,600 --> 00:01:35,600 Probably yours, you fat bitch. 23 00:02:09,829 --> 00:02:13,090 Yay, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you. 24 00:02:13,370 --> 00:02:15,590 Tell her to stop saying my labubus are knockoffs. 25 00:02:16,550 --> 00:02:19,030 I'm sorry, what is a labubu? 26 00:02:19,370 --> 00:02:20,710 It's a little monster accessory. 27 00:02:21,130 --> 00:02:23,670 They come in blind boxes, so you never know which one you're going to get. 28 00:02:23,930 --> 00:02:27,770 Like you could just luck out and get a time to chill pajama gold labubu. Oh my 29 00:02:27,770 --> 00:02:28,790 God, that one is so cute. 30 00:02:29,050 --> 00:02:30,410 It's so cute, right? 31 00:02:31,130 --> 00:02:35,230 All right, ladies, why don't you just give me the dolls until the end of the 32 00:02:35,230 --> 00:02:36,230 school day? 33 00:02:37,190 --> 00:02:40,250 Go on out to recess and you can pick up your labubus after school. 34 00:02:40,690 --> 00:02:42,950 Wow, what kind of counseling was that? 35 00:02:43,530 --> 00:02:47,170 I don't know. Jesus sucks, dude. Our old counselor was so much better. 36 00:02:59,450 --> 00:03:00,790 Yeah, yeah, yeah, get some more over there. 37 00:03:01,050 --> 00:03:02,250 This side's starting to fall. 38 00:03:02,490 --> 00:03:03,970 We are the kings of the castle. 39 00:03:04,210 --> 00:03:05,210 Let us in. 40 00:03:05,690 --> 00:03:06,690 Hey, butters. 41 00:03:07,370 --> 00:03:08,630 Oh, well, uh, hey, Red. 42 00:03:10,170 --> 00:03:13,890 Um, I was just wondering what you're doing this weekend. 43 00:03:17,930 --> 00:03:18,930 Who, me? 44 00:03:19,190 --> 00:03:23,550 Yeah. Um, I'm having a birthday party at my house, and I was seeing if maybe 45 00:03:23,550 --> 00:03:25,650 you'd want to come hang out? 46 00:03:28,670 --> 00:03:29,810 You're talking about me. 47 00:03:30,310 --> 00:03:33,750 Yeah, I don't know. It's probably stupid. I shouldn't have asked. Never 48 00:03:34,050 --> 00:03:36,810 No, no, no, I'd love to come hang out with you on your birthday, Red. 49 00:03:37,260 --> 00:03:38,099 Really? You would? 50 00:03:38,100 --> 00:03:39,100 Well, sure. 51 00:03:39,120 --> 00:03:41,440 Okay, that's great. I'll text you all the details. 52 00:03:42,000 --> 00:03:43,440 Okay, Red. I'll see you then. 53 00:03:43,820 --> 00:03:47,960 Okay. And maybe I'll text you my birthday wish list, too, in case, you 54 00:03:47,960 --> 00:03:48,960 want to get me a present. 55 00:03:49,000 --> 00:03:50,000 Starting! 56 00:03:54,080 --> 00:03:55,180 Oh, my God, you guys. 57 00:03:55,500 --> 00:03:56,940 Red wants to hang out with me. 58 00:03:57,540 --> 00:03:58,540 That's incredible. 59 00:03:59,060 --> 00:04:01,000 Bro, it seems like she really likes you. 60 00:04:03,300 --> 00:04:05,300 Really excited to see you Saturday. 61 00:04:05,920 --> 00:04:08,160 Whoa. Me in red. 62 00:04:08,720 --> 00:04:09,720 Lucky. 63 00:04:10,260 --> 00:04:12,460 Here is my birthday gift wish list. 64 00:04:15,900 --> 00:04:17,640 This exact boo -boo -boo. 65 00:04:21,060 --> 00:04:22,980 Holy shit, you guys. You know what I think? 66 00:04:25,480 --> 00:04:29,000 I think on Saturday I'm going to find out if red -haired girls have a red 67 00:04:29,480 --> 00:04:30,480 Wow. 68 00:04:41,580 --> 00:04:45,140 Welcome to Shitty Asian Pop -Up Store. Can I take an autograph? 69 00:04:46,440 --> 00:04:48,960 Wait, didn't this place used to be Shitty Walk? 70 00:04:49,500 --> 00:04:51,240 Yeah, but our whole country changed. 71 00:04:51,660 --> 00:04:52,660 Didn't you hear the news? 72 00:04:52,880 --> 00:04:53,880 Walk is dead. 73 00:04:54,240 --> 00:04:56,280 It's Shitty Pop -Up now. What do you like to have? 74 00:04:56,640 --> 00:05:00,580 We got a Shitty Pop -Up keychain, Shitty cell phone charm, Shitty anime 75 00:05:00,580 --> 00:05:03,520 sculpture. Well, actually, I'm looking for a labubu. 76 00:05:04,020 --> 00:05:05,840 Oh, yeah, I would love a labubu. 77 00:05:06,380 --> 00:05:09,680 They're very hard to keep in stock. Very expensive because of tariffs. 78 00:05:10,220 --> 00:05:11,520 You know, it's really important. 79 00:05:11,820 --> 00:05:15,240 I got this new girlfriend, and she wants this specific Labubu for her birthday. 80 00:05:15,520 --> 00:05:19,700 Oh, that very rare Labubu. You only find that in a mystery box. 81 00:05:20,300 --> 00:05:21,300 Mystery box? 82 00:05:21,320 --> 00:05:22,760 Hi, are you guys still serving food? 83 00:05:23,120 --> 00:05:25,580 No, no, no. Walkie's dead. Haven't you heard the news? 84 00:05:27,380 --> 00:05:31,320 Can't I just buy this Labubu? No, that's not the way it works. You buy mystery 85 00:05:31,320 --> 00:05:34,120 box. You open it. Hopefully, you get the one you want. 86 00:05:34,560 --> 00:05:36,000 Okay, how much is a mystery box? 87 00:05:36,580 --> 00:05:37,580 Eighty -five dollars. 88 00:05:38,040 --> 00:05:39,040 Eighty -five? 89 00:05:39,220 --> 00:05:43,180 Yeah, you gotta pay tariff. You think I pay tariff? No, no, no, no, you pay 90 00:05:43,180 --> 00:05:45,400 tariff. Okay, I'll take one. 91 00:05:52,100 --> 00:05:53,100 Yeah, 92 00:05:59,940 --> 00:06:02,720 well, walkie's dead, you stupid beast. Stop nagging me. 93 00:06:04,200 --> 00:06:04,879 Dang it. 94 00:06:04,880 --> 00:06:05,980 This is the wrong one. 95 00:06:06,320 --> 00:06:09,740 Oh, yeah. That's just happiness, though, boo -boo. Very common. Very common. 96 00:06:10,000 --> 00:06:10,979 You try again. 97 00:06:10,980 --> 00:06:15,860 $85. I have to pay another $85, and I still might not get the one I want? Hey, 98 00:06:15,940 --> 00:06:20,020 it's not me. It's your government. I don't get fucked by tariffs. You get 99 00:06:20,020 --> 00:06:22,520 by tariffs. In China, we call that hot potato. 100 00:06:24,340 --> 00:06:26,140 You're watching Fox News. 101 00:06:27,440 --> 00:06:31,800 The president has just returned from his historic tariff summit overseas. 102 00:06:32,520 --> 00:06:36,560 There's the president now looking handsome as ever. Oh, and there's the 103 00:06:36,560 --> 00:06:39,520 of Darkness, who's been traveling with the president as of late. 104 00:06:40,080 --> 00:06:43,380 The president has made his way off of Air Force One and will now speak to a 105 00:06:43,380 --> 00:06:44,660 diverse crowd of reporters. 106 00:06:45,120 --> 00:06:46,120 Over here, Mr. President. 107 00:06:46,360 --> 00:06:48,880 Mr. President, how did the tariff meetings go? 108 00:06:49,340 --> 00:06:50,580 Ah, they went great, buddy. 109 00:06:52,600 --> 00:06:54,860 Mr. President, we're all dying to know something. 110 00:06:55,120 --> 00:06:59,220 Your wife, Melania, has been staying in New York and away from the White House. 111 00:06:59,480 --> 00:07:00,399 That's right. 112 00:07:00,400 --> 00:07:05,140 Well, what Fox News really wants to know is, are you fucking Satan? 113 00:07:06,700 --> 00:07:11,580 No, I'm not fucking Satan. We're just sort of hanging out. 114 00:07:11,880 --> 00:07:15,580 Oh, come on, President Trump. With everything you've been doing, pretty 115 00:07:15,580 --> 00:07:17,580 whole country thinks you're fucking Satan now. 116 00:07:17,860 --> 00:07:19,460 I'm not fucking Satan. 117 00:07:19,740 --> 00:07:20,740 Can we go, please? 118 00:07:24,650 --> 00:07:29,210 He is fucking Satan. That guy's definitely fucking Satan. What a stud. 119 00:07:29,550 --> 00:07:30,770 Yeah, Fox News. 120 00:07:32,490 --> 00:07:35,470 All right, everyone, listen up. As you know, there's a lot being done in the 121 00:07:35,470 --> 00:07:38,710 country to bring Christian values back to our schools. Our new school counselor 122 00:07:38,710 --> 00:07:41,210 has some concerns that I understand he'd like to voice. Go ahead, Jesus. 123 00:07:43,750 --> 00:07:48,690 Well, I'm just a bit confused about the dramatic rise in fist fighting over 124 00:07:48,690 --> 00:07:49,710 these labubus. 125 00:07:50,190 --> 00:07:53,810 Oh, yeah, the labubus. Kids go nuts for them. 126 00:07:54,320 --> 00:07:57,380 I just don't quite understand what the fascination is. 127 00:07:57,660 --> 00:07:59,700 Well, they're just the new fad of the month, you know. 128 00:07:59,920 --> 00:08:02,260 They make them scarce and hard to find a secret one. 129 00:08:02,480 --> 00:08:05,160 Yeah, and then all the kids make their LaBooBoo TikToks. 130 00:08:05,780 --> 00:08:06,780 LaBooBoo TikTok? 131 00:08:06,880 --> 00:08:10,140 Yeah, the kids make them and they watch them. I can pull one up. This is Kelly 132 00:08:10,140 --> 00:08:11,480 Bronson from Mrs. Turner's class. 133 00:08:12,540 --> 00:08:14,900 Hey, guys. This is another LaBooBoo unboxing video. 134 00:08:15,500 --> 00:08:18,760 I got this LaBooBoo online. I'm pretty sure it's not a LaFooFoo. I got the QR 135 00:08:18,760 --> 00:08:19,759 code right here. 136 00:08:19,760 --> 00:08:22,620 We're going to see what we got. Hope it's a rare one. If it is, I'm 137 00:08:22,620 --> 00:08:23,660 going to freak out. 138 00:08:24,220 --> 00:08:25,700 Okay, let's see, let's see, let's see. 139 00:08:28,660 --> 00:08:31,620 Oh, my God! 140 00:08:31,940 --> 00:08:32,940 Oh, my God! 141 00:08:33,539 --> 00:08:35,480 Okay, okay, let's start the ritual. 142 00:08:55,760 --> 00:08:56,840 What the hell was that? 143 00:08:57,220 --> 00:08:59,240 That's a Labubu unboxing TikTok. 144 00:08:59,660 --> 00:09:01,020 Kids go nuts for him. 145 00:09:01,840 --> 00:09:04,100 But that's like some dark satanic ritual. 146 00:09:04,540 --> 00:09:06,180 Oh, yeah, Labubus are demonic. 147 00:09:06,480 --> 00:09:07,480 Yeah, dark magic. 148 00:09:07,720 --> 00:09:10,200 I don't know if they come that way from China or their kids are infusing them 149 00:09:10,200 --> 00:09:11,600 with some Sumerian dark entity. 150 00:09:11,980 --> 00:09:12,980 It's Mesopotamian. 151 00:09:13,180 --> 00:09:15,100 Got it. So what are your major concerns, Jesus? 152 00:09:17,900 --> 00:09:21,620 Bro, that's not normal. These kids are in trouble. 153 00:09:22,220 --> 00:09:24,420 Yeah, that's why every school needs a counselor. 154 00:09:37,980 --> 00:09:40,120 Welcome to City Pop -Up. Take a hot break. 155 00:09:40,420 --> 00:09:44,720 I have $88 .42 in here. I need to buy another mystery box. 156 00:09:45,120 --> 00:09:46,099 Oh, sorry. 157 00:09:46,100 --> 00:09:47,820 La Boo Boo Mystery Box, $120. 158 00:09:48,380 --> 00:09:50,060 What? It was $85. 159 00:09:50,520 --> 00:09:53,940 Yeah, yeah, Taft went up. You never know with Taft. They make low stands. 160 00:09:54,360 --> 00:09:55,400 But that's not fair. 161 00:09:55,820 --> 00:09:57,340 No shit, Taft, not fair. 162 00:09:57,700 --> 00:10:01,460 Please, sir. My girlfriend's party is today. And I have to get the La Boo Boo 163 00:10:01,460 --> 00:10:02,159 she wants. 164 00:10:02,160 --> 00:10:04,920 Please. It's okay. It's okay. I have idea. 165 00:10:05,440 --> 00:10:07,400 You want mystery box for cheap price? 166 00:10:07,820 --> 00:10:09,320 You use crime machine. 167 00:10:10,020 --> 00:10:13,840 You try your luck. Use a crime machine. You get a mystery box. Open it up. 168 00:10:13,860 --> 00:10:15,440 Hopefully you get the boo -boo you want. 169 00:10:21,840 --> 00:10:27,840 Oh, you're so cross. 170 00:10:28,120 --> 00:10:29,120 Try again. 171 00:10:29,220 --> 00:10:30,220 Oh, jeez. 172 00:10:35,520 --> 00:10:36,660 Oh, here we go. 173 00:10:37,000 --> 00:10:39,700 I get screwed by Tab, so I have to screw the children. 174 00:10:40,040 --> 00:10:41,200 What do you not understand? 175 00:10:44,960 --> 00:10:45,960 Yeah, 176 00:10:46,480 --> 00:10:49,140 well, walk not coming back, bitch. Go walk, go block. 177 00:10:51,920 --> 00:10:54,440 Thank you for coming, Mrs. Paxton, Mrs. Gray. 178 00:10:55,020 --> 00:10:58,780 The reason I called you in today is because your girls were in a major 179 00:10:58,780 --> 00:11:00,280 altercation over their labubus. 180 00:11:00,800 --> 00:11:02,480 Okay, so what are you going to do about it? 181 00:11:03,359 --> 00:11:07,380 Well, I was hoping we could work together to maybe just keep them away 182 00:11:07,380 --> 00:11:11,260 lububus. Oh, sure. Just take their lububus away. Great counseling. 183 00:11:11,880 --> 00:11:15,800 Look, I have reason to believe that the students are using lububus for some kind 184 00:11:15,800 --> 00:11:17,200 of ritual. 185 00:11:17,740 --> 00:11:21,040 Yeah, but to do that, you have to have a super rare one. They're the only ones 186 00:11:21,040 --> 00:11:22,300 girls can use in dark rituals. 187 00:11:22,900 --> 00:11:24,400 You know that they're demonic? 188 00:11:24,800 --> 00:11:29,040 Yeah. What are we supposed to do? My daughter sees Kelly Miller summoning 189 00:11:29,040 --> 00:11:32,180 demonic forces on TikTok, then she wants to be like Kelly Miller. 190 00:11:33,200 --> 00:11:35,100 Did Kelly Miller summon demonic forces? 191 00:11:35,340 --> 00:11:36,680 I don't know. She hung herself. 192 00:11:37,080 --> 00:11:39,540 Well, we should probably keep the girls off of TikTok. 193 00:11:39,900 --> 00:11:41,620 Oh, yeah. Just keep them off TikTok. 194 00:11:41,940 --> 00:11:43,480 That's some clever counseling there. 195 00:11:43,760 --> 00:11:44,759 Do you have kids? 196 00:11:44,760 --> 00:11:45,760 No, I don't. 197 00:11:46,000 --> 00:11:49,480 Figures. Well, when you do, you try and keep them off of TikTok and out of the 198 00:11:49,480 --> 00:11:50,480 Asian pop -up store. 199 00:11:50,760 --> 00:11:53,220 Wait. What is an Asian pop -up store? 200 00:11:53,620 --> 00:11:57,100 That's where the girls get all the little boo -boos. Where did they find 201 00:11:57,100 --> 00:11:59,120 guy? We told you he was a crappy counselor. 202 00:12:01,930 --> 00:12:03,670 This is a Fox News alert. 203 00:12:04,390 --> 00:12:09,610 As debates on American tariffs continue, the question on every American's mind 204 00:12:09,610 --> 00:12:12,510 tonight, is President Trump fucking Satan? 205 00:12:12,810 --> 00:12:16,310 The president's been seen less and less with his wife and more often with his 206 00:12:16,310 --> 00:12:20,590 new pal, making people all around the world say Donald Trump has got to be 207 00:12:20,590 --> 00:12:21,890 fucking Satan for sure. 208 00:12:22,570 --> 00:12:25,930 Well, for all of us who are still skeptical that President Trump is 209 00:12:25,930 --> 00:12:30,170 Satan, Fox News has obtained some footage of President Trump seeming to be 210 00:12:30,170 --> 00:12:31,170 fucking Satan. 211 00:12:31,360 --> 00:12:34,880 This was at a golf course yesterday where the president was heroically 212 00:12:34,900 --> 00:12:38,460 You can just make out Satan going behind a bush and President Trump right there. 213 00:12:38,700 --> 00:12:42,160 He's fucking Satan. Karen, what do you think? I think the president is 214 00:12:42,160 --> 00:12:45,180 definitely fucking Satan, and I love it. 215 00:12:45,440 --> 00:12:48,940 Of course, a lot of Americans still argue there's no way the president could 216 00:12:48,940 --> 00:12:52,960 fucking Satan. So we have a body language expert to show us just how it 217 00:12:52,960 --> 00:12:54,920 possible. Well... If Mr. 218 00:12:55,200 --> 00:12:59,120 President Trump is fucking Satan, and I'm not saying if he is or he isn't, I'm 219 00:12:59,120 --> 00:13:03,100 just kind of hoping he is, he mostly likely is coming in from the back. 220 00:13:03,400 --> 00:13:06,960 Now, Satan has a pretty large physical presence, so we're pretty sure President 221 00:13:06,960 --> 00:13:11,080 Trump would have to get on top of him. Oh, my God. The president is doing 222 00:13:11,080 --> 00:13:13,560 no other president has done before. I love him. 223 00:13:13,860 --> 00:13:17,260 You don't think President Trump is fucking Satan? This definitely proves 224 00:13:17,260 --> 00:13:18,260 could be. 225 00:13:30,220 --> 00:13:32,840 Welcome to Shitty Asian Pop -Up Store. Take out a piece. 226 00:13:33,260 --> 00:13:36,920 Are you the one that has been selling all these labubus to my students? 227 00:13:37,700 --> 00:13:38,699 Oh, boy. 228 00:13:38,700 --> 00:13:41,140 Look, not my fault these shitty prices, okay? 229 00:13:41,460 --> 00:13:42,460 Labubus very expensive. 230 00:13:42,840 --> 00:13:44,940 Those dolls you are selling are cursed. 231 00:13:45,220 --> 00:13:46,400 Yeah, no shit they cursed. 232 00:13:46,660 --> 00:13:48,880 It's called tariff. You pass it along. 233 00:13:49,180 --> 00:13:51,720 I curse, I put the curse on you. It's like an AIDS. 234 00:13:52,020 --> 00:13:53,440 Oh, my God. I got it. 235 00:13:53,780 --> 00:13:55,300 I got the super rare. 236 00:13:55,840 --> 00:13:57,340 Hey, what the hell are you talking about? 237 00:13:57,620 --> 00:13:58,840 This is the one my girlfriend wants. 238 00:13:59,440 --> 00:14:00,800 I can take it to a birthday party. 239 00:14:01,140 --> 00:14:02,900 My child, put that down. It's dangerous. 240 00:14:03,300 --> 00:14:07,240 Hey, hold on. That's super wet. That was like $600. 241 00:14:07,480 --> 00:14:08,600 You got to pay more tariffs. 242 00:14:10,980 --> 00:14:11,980 Oh, 243 00:14:13,420 --> 00:14:14,920 my God. We go away. 244 00:14:15,120 --> 00:14:18,500 Listen, both of you. There are more important issues at hand. 245 00:14:18,820 --> 00:14:21,320 My child, you cannot take that to a birthday party. 246 00:14:23,280 --> 00:14:24,440 Oh, shit. Where you go? 247 00:14:47,770 --> 00:14:50,150 Satan, why are you so sad? 248 00:14:51,690 --> 00:14:54,850 I wish to be gone from this place. 249 00:14:56,470 --> 00:14:57,890 I do not understand. 250 00:14:58,590 --> 00:15:02,350 If you do not want to be here, then why do you stay? 251 00:15:03,350 --> 00:15:07,070 I am forced to stay by the dark tides of destiny. 252 00:15:07,910 --> 00:15:11,870 I wanted to leave months ago, but I cannot. 253 00:15:13,090 --> 00:15:15,550 Because of what's in this box. 254 00:15:19,400 --> 00:15:20,700 What's in the box? 255 00:15:21,340 --> 00:15:27,060 The secret none must know, and yet all will soon discover. 256 00:15:28,080 --> 00:15:30,660 I can feel the tides of change. 257 00:15:31,520 --> 00:15:34,820 The final showdown is upon us. 258 00:16:00,700 --> 00:16:04,320 Well, you'll have to wait till you open it and find out if you're... Oh, all 259 00:16:04,320 --> 00:16:05,320 right then. 260 00:16:47,180 --> 00:16:48,360 I'm sorry, we're closed. 261 00:16:48,680 --> 00:16:51,220 Beth, I need to know which of the students has a birthday today. 262 00:16:52,220 --> 00:16:53,220 Who is this? 263 00:16:53,400 --> 00:16:54,400 It's me, Jesus. 264 00:16:55,620 --> 00:16:57,580 Who? The school counselor. 265 00:16:58,160 --> 00:17:01,940 Oh. I don't know who has a birthday today. That was actually always the 266 00:17:01,940 --> 00:17:02,940 counselor's job. 267 00:17:03,440 --> 00:17:05,500 Can you just look it up in the school records, please? 268 00:17:06,540 --> 00:17:07,479 Hang on. 269 00:17:07,480 --> 00:17:09,280 Guess I'm doing your job, too, now. 270 00:17:11,180 --> 00:17:16,560 Okay. Okay. Oh, my God. I'm so excited to finally do it. Well, yeah, I guess. 271 00:17:16,730 --> 00:17:18,190 I'm excited to do it too, Red. 272 00:17:18,690 --> 00:17:22,210 Okay, I think we're all ready. Here, you take a video of the whole thing. 273 00:17:22,630 --> 00:17:24,190 Oh, can't we just kiss first? 274 00:17:25,109 --> 00:17:27,609 Hey, what's up, guys? This is my Tick Tock La Boo Boo video. 275 00:17:27,810 --> 00:17:30,030 I got to super rare, so let's see if it works. 276 00:18:33,320 --> 00:18:37,180 Another Trump and Satan spotting. The two are rumored to be in a small 277 00:18:37,180 --> 00:18:39,800 town in the Rockies. Let's go to our Colorado affiliate. 278 00:18:40,820 --> 00:18:44,620 Yeah, guys, there's definitely black clouds and swarms of locusts here. 279 00:18:45,160 --> 00:18:47,120 Probably another labubu party. 280 00:18:47,340 --> 00:18:50,660 You know, whenever there's a labubu party, the president and Satan usually 281 00:18:50,660 --> 00:18:51,419 an appearance. 282 00:18:51,420 --> 00:18:54,180 We've got our eye in the sky now. Guys, what are you seeing? 283 00:19:04,460 --> 00:19:05,460 Come on, let's go. 284 00:19:06,420 --> 00:19:07,420 Lucifer! 285 00:19:10,060 --> 00:19:12,680 So, it is you. 286 00:19:13,420 --> 00:19:16,920 Just what are you doing, Satan? I will know. 287 00:19:18,840 --> 00:19:23,320 Okay, it looks like Jesus Christ is now on the scene for some kind of biblical 288 00:19:23,320 --> 00:19:28,460 showdown. I have seen your evil at work, Satan. I bid you leave this realm at 289 00:19:28,460 --> 00:19:31,300 once. You think I don't want to leave? 290 00:19:31,500 --> 00:19:33,200 I am bound to him. 291 00:19:34,380 --> 00:19:35,380 Come to Him. 292 00:20:08,140 --> 00:20:12,100 I am forced to stay in this situation for several more years. 293 00:20:15,680 --> 00:20:20,560 Uh, Satan is saying he's been trapped at the White House because he's pregnant. 294 00:20:21,060 --> 00:20:25,100 Uh, let's get our science expert in here to see if that's actually possible. 295 00:20:25,780 --> 00:20:31,400 Yeah, uh, demonic pregnancies work a little different. The term is butt baby. 296 00:20:31,760 --> 00:20:35,860 All right, well, that seems to be it. Satan is pregnant with the president's 297 00:20:35,860 --> 00:20:41,800 child. So Fox News can now confirm Donald Trump has been fucking Satan this 298 00:20:41,800 --> 00:20:42,800 whole time. 299 00:20:43,420 --> 00:20:50,220 For all the doubters who thought Donald Trump wasn't fucking 300 00:20:50,220 --> 00:20:52,080 Satan, in your face. 301 00:20:52,500 --> 00:20:56,100 We're going to check in now with Kid Rock. Kid, you must be overcome with 302 00:20:56,100 --> 00:20:57,500 emotion. I do. 303 00:20:58,030 --> 00:21:02,230 I just honestly didn't think the president was fucking Satan, but now 304 00:21:02,230 --> 00:21:06,130 that he has been this whole time, I'm just so happy. 305 00:21:10,630 --> 00:21:13,290 Well, I hope you guys learned a valuable lesson. 306 00:21:13,930 --> 00:21:18,210 If you mess around and you aren't safe, it can have really big consequences. 307 00:21:21,390 --> 00:21:23,750 Yeah, I'm not having sex for a long time. 308 00:21:24,010 --> 00:21:26,490 And I'm done with the boobers. Well, that's good. 309 00:21:26,840 --> 00:21:31,860 Because as your counselor, I'm banning the boo -boos from school and TikTok and 310 00:21:31,860 --> 00:21:32,860 cell phones. 311 00:21:32,880 --> 00:21:35,660 Now get back to class. You both have detention for two weeks. 312 00:21:36,000 --> 00:21:37,000 Oh, man. 313 00:21:38,200 --> 00:21:40,080 Wow, new counselor's kind of a dick. 314 00:21:40,460 --> 00:21:42,380 Yeah, but he's better than the last guy. 315 00:21:47,020 --> 00:21:48,220 La boo -boo.